Pensioner Who 'Identifies As 49' Asks Court To Change Age
A 69-year-old man wants to legally wind back the clock on his birth certificate because he identifies as a 49-year-old.
And the reason? Tinder.
Yep, in what we thought was pure satire, Dutchman Emile Ratelband is actually dead serious.
His argument is that if transgender people are allowed to self-identify, he should be allowed to change his date of birth because doctors said he has the body of a 45-year-old.
"I have done a check-up and what does it show? My biological age is 45 years. When I'm 69, I am limited. If I'm 49, then I can buy a new house, drive a different car. I can take up more work.
“Transgender people can now have their gender changed on their birth certificate, and in the same spirit there should be room for an age change.”
But it’s his other argument that seems to lend itself to the real reason.
"When I'm on Tinder and it say I'm 69, I don't get an answer. When I'm 49, with the face I have, I will be in a luxurious position.”
And there it is.
He also shored-up his claim by adding that it would be good for the government as he would renounce his pension until he reaches retirement age again.
The court was sympathetic to him but was concerned was allowing people to change their birth date – meaning legally deleting part of their lives.
"For whom did your parents care in those years? Who was that little boy back then?" the judge said.
The court will deliver it’s ruling within four weeks.
Pretty sure they’re gonna swipe left.